So Homer headed over to a overpriced area wine store this afternoon to buy his Pahr-ball ticket, ‘cuz ya can’t win if we don’t play. If he wins a 78-million dollar jackpot, he’ll be in bacon cheeseburgers for life. And, vital in an already tony and pretended neighborhood, there’s always something going on during a wine store.
Today, streamer behind to a lottery machine, he notices today’s tasting is for something called JuJu. It’s a liqueur, comes in a transparent bottle, and there’s a cannabis root on a label. Hmmm.
“It has a ambience of cannabis,” says a immature male during a table, “although there’s no THC or any other pot derivative in it.” Hmmm. And double hmmmm.
Good thing Martavis and Le’Veon aren’t here, Homer thinks to himself.
“Where’s this things made?” Homer asks.
“Monroe, Wisconin, though it’s bottled right here in DC,” replies a immature man. “It’s a really honeyed liqueur, with hints of extract, lemon, and a diesel-like (?) aroma.”
He mentioned that Monroe, Wisconsin is, “somewhere nortwest of Chicago,” that was intensely helpful, given that sorta describes approximately 99% of a Cheesehead State.
He never explained what a “hint of extract” was, nor given anyone would wish to guzzle a diesel-like aroma, though that creates no nevermind.
Homer mentioned he knew of a male named John Smith who everybody called Juju, and it went sailing over this bad kid’s head. Homer afterwards mentioned that Juju didn’t splash or smoke, and a child pronounced that Juju a male substantially wouldn’t wish any of Juju a faux-dope beverage.
Homer took a sip, and it was sweeter than sugar, smooth, and – on second suspicion – waaay too sweet, even for a liqueur. It did, however, seem to presumably have a gloomy ambience of weed in there with a lemon and that diesel crap.
He afterwards took a label from a Juju pusher, that review (exactly), “JuJu is a World’s First Liqueur subsequent from a HIGH peculiarity cooking EXTRACT with honeyed hints of lemon, earthy, and diesel-like aromas. Our smooth, 31.5% ethanol calm creates for a well-spoken candy-like shot….” (The caps above are theirs)
Anyway, Homer didn’t buy any of a stuff, given he’s already dipsomaniac on Juju, and has been given Latrobe. But if don’t trust all this, we can google JuJu Beverages, or e-mail them during JuJuBeverages@gmail.com. “Join a Revolution,” they say, and “ask about box discounts.”
If we wish to season diesel-like aroma, Homer suggests unresolved around a New Stanton rotate on a turnpike or maybe stalling out in a Liberty Tubes.
Olde Frothlingslosh was better, cheaper, colder, and didn’t have to pass itself off as weed. Forget about fasten a series with mistake dope, and pass a pale, seared ale with a froth on a bottom.
We’ll take a Juju on a field, appreciate you. And pass a Olde Frothingslosh, a stretchable beer. So flexible, it can fit into roughly any glass!